An Expecting Grandpa Who's Still Nonchalant About Newborns

Today, We Honor The Overall Man Classic Bill Mead

Reprinted with permission from Tehachapi Lifestyle Magazine, March 2013 issue

As I have mentioned before, two of our daughters are expecting babies, one of them due within the next week.

My wife is getting choked up about the imminent arrival of Debbie Morrison’s baby, our first grandchild. My wife is also getting set to choke me up because of my noncommittal attitude about this tribal milestone.

The truth is, I have a hard time establishing a meaningful relationship with a newborn baby. I panic when proud mothers order me to inspect their offspring. Babies all look alike to me. Too often I end up saying something like, “Gee, that’s a husky little guy” only to be told it’s a girl.

I won’t go so far as to agree with my niece, Jan Kennedy, who once electrified a family gathering with the observation that babies are yucky. Jan had just finished changing her two-week-old daughter and everybody forgave her. Nobody forgives me for anything so I had better practice sounding ecstatic about my grandchildren.

I’ll try but it won’t be easy. My wife says I’m crazy when I claim that tiny babies tend to be bland. Mostly they just lie there, is the way I see it. She swears they have definite personalities from day one. It takes at least six months before I notice an infant’s personality emerge. That’s based on my experience raising three terrific daughters. Still, I can’t remember any of them having a terrific first six months.

Our pregnant daughter #2, Carol Barrett, is a good example of a graceful transition from infant to person. As soon as she got big enough to be moved from crib to playpen we packed all her toys in a big cardboard box and put it in the pen. Carol immediately heaved out all the playthings and climbed into the box where she sat quietly for the next three years.

A baby like that I can dig.

If you don’t know Bill: Bill Mead was the longtime publisher of the Tehachapi News, along with Betty Mead, his wife and partner of more than 50 years. Known for his keen wit, which could be gentle or scathing or somewhere in between but was often self-deprecatory, Bill’s writing won him a wide following among News readers. His column “The Overall Picture” ran in the News for more than 25 years, and in 1999 he published a collection of his columns in a volume entitled The Napa Valley Outhouse War. His book is currently available for sale at the Tehachapi Museum for $10.

Bill had a remarkable mind and because of his intelligence, humor and appearance he was regarded by many as Tehachapi’s Mark Twain. As Betty used to remind him, he was “older than the oldest Model A Ford” and his wealth of life experiences and rural upbringing allowed him to bring a thoroughly American, 20th century perspective to his reflections and musings on the everyday. Bill passed away in 2008 but his writing lives on.

[Publisher’s note: I read Bill’s articles during the 80s and 90s and early 2000s and I am grateful to share them now with our current readers. I hope you enjoy this touch of nostalgia as much as I do.]